4 years, 6 months ago-
Posts
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https://www.linkedin.com/in/allison-murphy-298666199/
I probably need some help editing this! However imperfection action baby!
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Hi @allison-murphy, great job taking action in the program!! Below are my comments on your profile 🙂
Your current profile photo is super cute but remember, you want them to do business with you. I’d like you to find a professional photo of your smiling at the camera and please ZOOM into your face so we can see it clearly.
If you email it to our graphic designer, Lindsey, ask her to add a white background for you. This will help it look professional.
You also need a background photo. I’d also like you to email Lindsey, and tell her a little about your field of business and she can create something better!
Headline:
LOVE it – great work!!!
About section:
There’s great content but it’s a little hard to follow. You also want to only have your call to action at the very end.
Since you have the content, all you need to do is organize it.
Please refer to this profile below and feel free to copy the FORMAT/outline and pay attention to the way they lead you through their profile.
Look how they detail HOW they help their clients, WHO they work with, etc.
https://www.linkedin.com/in/marcustexada/
CALL TO ACTION – you need a better one:
If you’re READY for _______ message me here on LinkedIn to see if we’re a good fit!
Please tag me after you make the necessary revisions!
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Hey @allison-murphy, thanks for revising! Happy to provide you with some feedback:
Your profile photo looks great – please zoom in a bit more so we can see your face clearly!
Your background image is currently of Tulips but we find that using this space to directly reflect your business is very crucial. I’d like you to still go ahead and email our graphic designer Lindsey, tell her about your field of business, and she will create a custom banner image for you.
GREAT headline!!
About Section:
Right now, I’m seeing a lot of “I” and your message is a lot about YOU and not enough about THEM. You’ve got the content but it needs to be better organized to display your points effectively.
I’d like you to copy this profile’s outline and add your own information to it: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marcustexada/
^ his outline is the same that we teach in the program. While you have the content – it would look better in this format.
I also challenge you to replace “I” with “you” in certain areas.
Call to action could be better:
If you’re READY for _______ message me here on LinkedIn to see if we’re a good fit!
Great work overall 🙂
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Thank you for the link, however there are a ton of typo’s in that profile. I would hope that others are seeing them and not just copy and pasting if that is the one you provide for most agents. Or maybe just ask him to fix it… wandering = wondering for example. That’s why I didn’t want to use it in the first place. Anyway I took your advice and changed it to fit my profile and have updated it.
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Hey @allison-murphy, thank you for bringing that to my attention! It looks like Marcus changed a lot of things from when I last saw it. Oops!
LOVE the changes you made – your sales letter flows so much better!
Did you email Lindsey about your banner image?
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