Viewing 11 reply threads
  • Author
    Posts
    • #47109

      Michael Hughes
      Participant
        @mhughes@livsir.com

        @halle-eavelyn @negeen-dargahi @tony-liddic @kent-littlejohn

        Please review and let me know what you think, revisions, additions, deletions, I’m ready for anything:

         

        http://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-hughes-sothebysrealtor

        Thank you Michael

         

      • #47117

        n d
        Keymaster
          @negeen@coredm.com

          Hey there @michael-hughes-2-2! First off, nice job taking action!

          Did you email Lindsey about creating a banner image for you??

          Additionally, I’d like you to fix up your headline based on the feedback I provided in your last review:

          http://app.hecp.com/forums/topic/linkedin-profile-review-52/

          ^ please make sure to check out my comments and implement them 🙂

          About Section:

          The information you’ve provided is GOOD but I there needs to be a better flow with your message because right now it’s just a lot of info but it isn’t flowing well.

          Here is an example of a realtor’s profile that will better assist:

          https://www.linkedin.com/in/elois-fuller-9b033723/ 

          She is taking her reader through everything she does but what matters with her sales letter is the flow.

          You HAVE the information, I just want it to flow a little bit better.

          Additionally – fantastic testimonials!! I know you have 5 written, but let’s just have 3 of your favorites.

          Lastly, you need a call to action at the end of your sales letter.

          My previous feedback shows you a template on what to add:

          LinkedIn Profile Review

        • #47119

          Michael Hughes
          Participant
            @mhughes@livsir.com

            @negeen-dargahi

            @negeen-dargahi

            Ok so my clients don’t give a damn about saving money.  Maybe time and effort. I have $10m + under contract right now and there has got to be a better way than sounding like a used car salesman on some of the Realtors LI sites i have seen. Keeping an open mind but got to tell you this does not seem sotheby’s. Somehow i need to elevate the conversation.

          • #47128

            Michael Hughes
            Participant
              @mhughes@livsir.com

              Ok so my clients don’t give a damn about saving money.  Maybe time and effort. I have $10m + under contract right now and there has got to be a better way than sounding like a used car salesman on some of the Realtors LI sites i have seen. Keeping an open mind but got to tell you this does not seem sotheby’s. Somehow i need to elevate the conversation.

              @negeen-dargahi

              @halle-eavelyn

               

            • #47133

              n d
              Keymaster
                @negeen@coredm.com

                Hey there @michael-hughes-2-2, absolutely! I totally understand. Feel free to use my feedback as an outline and guide to help you strengthen your message.

                But, based on the teachings of the lessons, I would recommend you apply my feedback on your: banner/background image, headline, and the structure of your About section.

                Feel free to remove any aspects that sound uncomfortable and salesy for you and I can review again 🙂

              • #47136

                Michael Hughes
                Participant
                  @mhughes@livsir.com

                  Will do. Lindsey did create a great banner. I just need to go back and listen to the lesson about how to attach to LI

                • #47141

                  Michael Hughes
                  Participant
                    @mhughes@livsir.com

                    Hi Negeen, well I’m working on it. I hope it flows better now. https://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-hughes-sothebysrealtor/

                  • #47145

                    n d
                    Keymaster
                      @negeen@coredm.com

                      Hi @michael-hughes-2-2, wow Lindsey did a great job at your banner image! It really transforms your LinkedIn page (nice job uploading it)!

                      Your headline is a really big piece of real estate on your profile.

                      What you currently have written is:

                      “Residential Real Estate Agent at LIV Sotheby’s International Realty”

                      I would take a look back at my feedback and see if you can either apply what I’ve suggested or tweak it to really showcase your services.

                      About section:

                      It looks good but try to read it out loud and fix parts that don’t come naturally, there are some abrupt breaks in some of your sentences.

                      Move: Text or call me today to see if we’re a good fit.

                      To after your testimonials.

                      Instead of saying “TESTIMONIALS” try to replace with “What Happy Clients Have Said”

                      Good work 🙂

                    • #47170

                      Michael Hughes
                      Participant
                        @mhughes@livsir.com

                        What would you put besides

                        “Residential Real Estate Agent at LIV Sotheby’s International Realty”

                         

                        • #47185

                          n d
                          Keymaster
                            @negeen@coredm.com

                            Hey @michael-hughes-2-2, below is one that I created for you! Feel free to tweak it a bit if you need to:

                            Want Maximum PROFIT From Selling Your Home WITHOUT Stress?☆EXPERT Agent Helping Clients In Boulder, CO☆☞ Message Me!

                            Want MAXIMUM Exposure When SELLING Your Home?☆ I’m An EXPERT Realtor Helping Clients In The Boulder Area☆ ☞ MSG ME!

                        • #47204

                          Michael Hughes
                          Participant
                            @mhughes@livsir.com

                            Ok changed it up a bit

                            https://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-hughes-sothebysrealtor/

                             

                            @halle-eavelyn

                            @negeen-dargahi

                             

                          • #47206

                            n d
                            Keymaster
                              @negeen@coredm.com

                              Hey @michael-hughes-2-2, it looks good but you added the text in the wrong spot. Instead of adding it to the about section, please add it to the headline section and you should be good to move forward 🙂

                               

                            • #47211

                              Michael Hughes
                              Participant
                                @mhughes@livsir.com

                                Oh man I just keep moving forward however imperfectly it is I do not let it paralyze me…….Onward!

                                 

                                @halle-eavelyn

                                @negeen-dargahi

                            Viewing 11 reply threads

                            Support Forums are being phased out. You can still view the existing Forum posts but can no longer post in them. For all Support needs, please email help@coredm.com or click the blue Question Mark icon in the lower right hand corner of your screen.