Linked In Profile – Round 3

[Harlow Hagee]

Hi Negeen,

Thanks for your latest feedback on my Linked In profile.  I have updated my profile based on your feedback.  Please review and send me any additional suggestions.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/harlowhagee/

Thank you,

Harlow

[n d]

Hi @harlow-hagee, thank you for submitting your profile and implementing my feedback! Below are my comments:

Headline: Move “contact me” to the end of your message in your headline.

Want to know the BEST way to sell your home and NET THE MOST MONEY with the least stress? ☆ Real Estate Expert helping people in the DFW area! ☆ Message me!

About section:

Too many capitalizations here in the first pain point question–> WITHOUT ALL THE STRESS!

Change to –> WITHOUT all of the added stress?

I love what you’ve done with your overall message! VERY powerful. The “when YOU work with me” and the “essentially” gets a bit too repetitive. Feel free to remove some and just let it flow with the rest of your message.

I’d like you to read your About section out loud and any parts that don’t flow, fix.

Such as the “when you work with me” and the “essentially” added. The content is GREAT, otherwise. I love the information you’ve added and I can tell how much stronger your message is.

Remove excess capitalized words in your call to action.

Once you remove those repeated words and fix the comments I made above, you are good to move forward!

Very proud of your work!

[n d]

Hi @harlow-hagee, I am loving your background banner! Looks very professional and better cropped.

Please review my comments above, as some of the changes haven’t been made such as the headline and the about section comments with the capitalized words.

Review my notes above and once you’ve done so, let me know and I’ll take another look. Thank you!

 

[Harlow Hagee]

Hi Negeen,

I think I have made all the changes you suggested.  Please review my profile and let me know if you have any additional suggestions.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/harlowhagee/

Many thanks!

Harlow

[n d]

Hi @harlow-hagee, your profile looks GREAT! I’m so proud of you for making all the revisions necessary to really make your profile shine! You are good to move forward!

 

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