5 years, 11 months ago-
Posts
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Hi @kendra-sanders, a really nice job revising!!
Great background and headline, this looks so much more inviting!
Please refrain from talking in the third person and instead talk in 2nd person.
If possible, I’d like you to copy this profile. This is the outline we recommend as far as content and format go.
Right now, you have very chunky paragraphs. (you can add in your own information to the profile).
https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-harris-aa0487119/
What I’m seeing is a LOT of numbers, which is good but this is a sales letter. You want to tell them who you work with, HOW you help them… and when you tell them about your testimonials like you have, really keep them within 1-2 sentences.
Call to action:
You need a powerful, short, and sweet call to action. Please use something like this:
If you’re ready for _______ then message me here on LinkedIn to see if we’re a good fit!
You’re so close 🙂 tag me in your revision!
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I made changes to match the example profile. Let me know your thoughts
http://www.linkedin.com/in/kendrasanderssellshomes
Thank you
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