Carol High Infomercial

[Carol High]

@halle-eavelyn @negeen-dargahi

Would you please review the copy for my infomercial.  Thank you.

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[n d]

Hi @carol-high! First off, great job taking massive imperfeCT action on your infomercial!

I really liked that you started it off asking pain point questions – let’s keep it to only three questions so it doesn’t drag on.

I’d also like you to replace the extra questions by detailing how you help your clients.

Follow the template below for better organization and then tag me to see:

—

How about you start off asking up to 3 POWERFUL pain point questions…

Are you WANTING _________?
Do you NEED __________?

Want __________?

(after you ask 3 questions)

If you answered ‘YES’ to those questions, you came to the right place!

Hi, I’m _______ and I am a ____________ helping clients with _________.

(2-5 sentences saying HOW exactly you plan to help / how you serve your clients)

(you can add 1-2 more sentences about why they should work with you or maybe a motivating 1 liner to get them excited)

If you want _______________ then message me here on LinkedIn to see if we’re a good fit.

[Carol High]

Are you wanting a place where you really like to go to work?  Do you need a workspace that is very efficient so you and your employees can make every minute, hour and day really productive?  Do you want to hire top notch employees so your business can grow and your profits keep going up?

You’ve come to the right place.

Hi, I’m Carol High.  My boutique commercial real estate business specializes in providing the best real estate solution for your company. Carol High Commercial Real Estate has been in business and listening well to clients for more than 3 decades.  We don’t stop with the first question.  We dig deeper and find out if there is a special thing that makes it easier to hire.  For instance, one of my clients, a strong, national environmental law firm has a group of attorneys that ride very high-end bikes to work.  Secure bike storage and accessible bike routes more important than the view to them.

In this current tight employment market, we often help the employer listen to their potential employment base – do they want to take light rail, walk to work, or be near the airport for the convenience of a globe-trotting sales force?  Are they young parents and need to have childcare nearby?  There may be other questions you might not think to ask.

My deep database, years of connections with listing brokers and owners, and my persistence means that I will find the best space available at the best price for your company.… You keep doing what you do.  I’ll solve your real estate problems.

When you’re ready, message me at Linked in to see if we’re a good fit.

I look forward to solving your real estate needs.

 

 

 

[n d]

Hi @carol-high – you did a nice job following the template and adding some really good content!

I do want to make it a bit shorter so it doesn’t go on for too long. Infomercials are typically 1min to 3min max.

I shortened some of your questions so it’s right to the point and doesn’t run on.

—

Are you DREAMING of going to work excited?

Do you NEED a productive workspace that is efficient so you and your employees can make every minute, hour and day COUNT?

Do you want to hire top-notch employees so your business can grow and your profits keep going up?

—

Below I’ve also taken out some bits that can do without being added to really tighten up your infomercial. 

Please fill in the blanks I provided:

If that sounds like you… You’ve come to the right place.

Hi, I’m Carol High. When you work with me, I provide you with TOP notch service with more than 3 DECADES of experience.  What’s better? I’ve got access to a deep database, years of connections with listing brokers and owners, to help you find the best space available at the best price for your company.… You keep doing what you do.  I’ll solve your real estate problems.

If you’re ready to finally get back on track with your business (you can change this), message me at Linked in to see if we’re a good fit.

I look forward to solving your real estate needs.

[Carol High]

Are you dreaming of going to work excited?
Do you NEED a productive workspace that’s efficient so you and your employees can make every minute of every day count?
Do you want to attract top-notch employees so your business can grow and make your profits go up?
If that sounds like you – you’ve come to the right place.
Hi, I’m Carol High. When you work with me I provide you with TOP notch service. With more than 3 decades of experience, I’ve got access to years of connections with listing brokers and owners
and I’ve got a deep database. I can find the best space available and negotiate the best deal for your company.
You keep doing what makes you money and I’ll solve your real estate needs.
If you’re ready to really get on track and take advantage of Denver’s booming economy, message me at LinkedIn or email carol@chighre.com
I look forward to solving your real estate needs.

[n d]

LOOKS GREAT, @carol-high 🙂

 

[Carol High]

Nageen:

I uploaded my infomercial to Linked in.  I’m not delighted with it but I found the process difficult so will go with it if you agree that it’s OK.

 

 

 

[n d]

Hi @carol-high, you did a SUPER job on your video. I’m so proud of you for memorizing your script, keeping that eye contact, and engaging with the viewer!!

Nice job taking action and you’re good to go!

[Author]

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