3 years, 9 months ago-
Posts
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Hi @steve-rath! Welcome to the program and nice job posting your profile for review – below are my comments:
GREAT profile photo – can you zoom in 50% more?? I want to make sure people are able to see your face clearly.
Your background image is blurry and could also be more professional. Our graphic designer, Lindsey, can actually make a custom banner image for you. When you email her, tell her about your field of work and if there are any phone numbers, logos, or websites you want to be added.
Headline:
I do like your headline BUT I cleaned it up a bit by removing the excess ****. Let’s really make it POP!
WANT To SELL your Investment Property for Top Dollar in 30 days or LESS? ☆ EXPERT Realtor Helping Clients Generate A Higher Cash Flow ☆☞ Message Me!
Summary:
When someone clicks to view your profile, the first 2 sentences of your profile About/summary section are available for them until they have to click “see more”. That means, your first 2 sentences are very important!
Right now, the focus is WAY too much on you and not enough on them.
“Steven Rath CRS, CDPE, SRES, RSPS. That’s a lot of letters after my name but what does it mean to you?”
- the sentence above would be best to either be removed or at the bottom (remove “That’s a lot of letters after my name but what does it mean to you?”
We want to remember that this is a sales letter so you want to effortlessly lead them through your message.
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How about you start off your sales letter asking 3 short and sweet pain point questions!
And then, you can introduce yourself, what you do, who you work with, and why clients should work with you!
In the profile accelerator lesson, we dive deep into the contents of your sales letter.
Pro tip: go to Kent’s profile, copy his About section, and ADD your own information to it. His outline is what we teach in the program! This should really help you with removing those bullet points and focusing on a powerful sales letter.
https://www.linkedin.com/in/klittlejohn/
ALSO — I know I mentioned above, but please remove the bullet points as it will make it difficult to read your message.
Call to action:
You need one at the end of your sales letter.
If you’re ready for _______ then give me a call TODAY at _______ or message me here on LinkedIn to see if we’re a good fit!
Please tag me after you make the necessary revisions! 🙂
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Hi Negeen and Thanks!
Funny, I moved the line “Steven Rath CRS, CDPE, SRES, RSPS. That’s a lot of letters after my name but what does it mean to you?” from the end to the beginning just before I submitted it to you.
I kinda thought that beginning with my designations was dry and boring. What kind of opening would you use.
I’ll look at Kent’s and adjust as needed. It was trickier than I thought it would be and I tend to over-think sometimes.
Have a good night,
Steve
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Hi Again Negeen,
I agree with the background photo so I changed to another I liked. I liked the theme of “Need a guide?” or “Let’s ride together” kind of thing. I’ll email Lindsay, but what-da-ya-think?
Also, next to my picture is Steve Rath @steve-rath. How do I get rid of that @steve-rath part and where did it come from?
Steve
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Hi @steve-rath! Yes, go ahead and email Lindsey about your banner and profile image 🙂
I like “Your EXPERT Guide!”
Once you make the changes, I’ll take a look and steer you in the right direction!!
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I changed my background….again. My wife didn’t like it as she thought it was too busy. So I went to a photo that feels relaxed and serves a good lifestyle.
I still like the raft, but I like this one as well.
https://www.linkedin.com/in/steverathbroker/
what do you think? Opinion?
Thanks,
Steve
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Hi @steve-rath, to confirm, you did email Lindsey but the photo was too busy?? Just want to double check that it was submitted – what you have is good! In the future, Lindsey can add logos or text if needed.
Great profile photo change!!
Your headline Is on the right page but please remove the ****** from MSG me. I also fixed the headline for you so it’s easier to read:
Ready To SELL Your Investment Property For Top Dollar in 30 days or LESS? ☆ EXPERT Realtor Helping Clients Generate A Higher Cash Flow ☆☞ Message Me!
^ I know this is what I added in your initial feedback but your headline slot is the best piece of real estate on your profile – it’s important to really make it pop!! You can change the words after “EXPERT” if you’d like something else.
Your number stats should be towards the end because right now i’m trying to get in the flow of your sales letter but with all the numbers and stats (WHICH ARE GOOD) it’s making it hard to know exactly what you do. I began the sales letter flow at “If this sounds like you”.
Try to ask 3 pain point questions, then get into the “if this sounds like you” and then you can add the stats and why they should work with you.
- you have all the content!!
I hope this helps! Once these changes are made, you’re good to move forward 🙂
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OK, I like it.
Generally, how do YOU like it?
Also, I was torn between going with the investor profile or the high-end seller profile, but went with investor because I thought there would be less people in that space, but I do love high-end sellers.
Your thoughts?
Have a great day,
Steve
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Hi @steve-rath, once you move the sections around based on my previous comments, it’s going to look great and flow better!
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