Hi @john-mccomas! Nice job taking massive imperfeCT action on your profile. Below is my feedback:

Profile Photo:

Great photo but zoom in at least 50% more so we can see more of your face and less of your body.

Background Photo:

You also need a background photo (the rectangular blue space behind your profile photo).

I want you to email our graphic designer, Lindsey, and tell her a little about your field of business and she can create something for you to use!

Lindsey@coredm.com

Headline:

What you have is good but a bit incomplete. How about this:

Want Maximum PROFIT From Selling Your Home WITHOUT Stress?☆EXPERT Realtor Helping Clients In [LOCATION]☆☞ Message Me!

Summary:

You’ve got some good content but since this is your sales letter, let’s get it a bit more organized.

Your first 2 sentences of your summary are the MOST important.

How about you ask 3 POWERFUL pain point questions your clients struggle with.

What are their pain points? “Tired of _____” “Want _______ but CANT?” “Are you ______?” THEN, after you list pain points, say HOW you can help them and WHAT exactly you do to help them achieve that.

Also, your paragraphs are a bit chunky and need better organization. (check out the examples I provided and look at the format which you can copy)

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-harris-aa0487119/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/marcustexada/

You want to provide information that is:

Telling your readers WHO you work with, HOW you help them and WHY they should work with you.

You can talk about yourself but keep it to 2-3 sentences so it really stays focused on them.

Call To Action:

You need one!

If you’re ready for _______ then message me here on LinkedIn to see if we’re a good fit!

Please tag me in your revision! 🙂

Hi @john-mccomas! SUPER SUPER job on your profile!

Put “I” before “know what you’re thinking”.

Did you email Lindsey in regards to your background image??

Also, I love your profile photo but do you have the same photo but in better quality? This one looks quite grainy.

Everything else looks FAN-tastic 🙂

Hi @john-mccomas! The high resolution photo looks SO much better 🙂