Dashboard › Forums › High End Client Program › LinkedIn – Infomercial Reviews & Questions › Informercial script–rough draft
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May 2, 2018 at 1:12 pm #10069
VERSION #1—straight up boring, but professional
Thanks for visiting my LinkedIN profile…I’m Scott Trueblood with BrandVision Marketing. If your business is competing in a competitive environment and you’re looking to grow…or, if you’d just like to takes the hassles and headaches of making your marketing efforts come to life, email me today…we can schedule a quick getting to know you call and see if we’re a good fit to work together.
BrandVision is an extension of your marketing department—we’ll take your goals and budget and together develop and implement a plan to make it happen. BrandVision isn’t tied to one element of marketing—we’re not pushing one form or another…rather, we objectively look at what will best work for you and make those components come to life. Sound interesting? Message me today and let’s schedule a quick call to see if we’re a good fit!
VERSION #2—a little more personality, but served with some mozarella
Hello LinkedIn Viewer and welcome to my profile…also known as The True Show! I’m Scott Trueblood with BrandVision Marketing, your host. How can I help YOU? Well, honestly, I can’t help everyone, but if you’re a business owner or marketing manager working in a competitive industry and you’re looking to grow your brand and business, we may be a good fit. Or—if you’re just looking for a way to take a lot of the headaches and hassles of making your marketing efforts come to life…then, yeah…we may be a good fit.
Typically, we work with small to medium size companies where one or two people are handling all of the marketing tasks. From plan development to implementation, we work with you to look at your goals and budget to put a plan into motion. Whether it’s internet marketing, a website…social media…printing, promotional products or even traditional advertising, we help develop the perfect plan for your situation in your industry and market within your budget. We’re both busy, but if any of this sounds like a fit for you…message me and let’s schedule a Getting to Know You session on the True Show! Best wishes…and thanks for watching!
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May 2, 2018 at 3:24 pm #10085
I finished My Hero Story avatar. Should I be waiting for something from you or
should I send a draft of what I have written?
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May 2, 2018 at 3:26 pm #10087
@scott-trueblood, you are a hoot! I love that you add a fun element, if I can help, here is a template you can follow. Actually, think of it as a condensed version of your LI summary
- start off with an attention grabber (3 pain point questions)
- Introduce yourself and what you do
- Talk about how you help your clients and why they should work with you
- Call to action
What you have is great, it just needs to be cleaned up a bit 🙂
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May 2, 2018 at 3:26 pm #10089
@scott-trueblood, you are a hoot! I love that you add a fun element, if I can help, here is a template you can follow. Actually, think of it as a condensed version of your LI summary
- start off with an attention grabber (3 pain point questions)
- Introduce yourself and what you do
- Talk about how you help your clients and why they should work with you
- Call to action
What you have is great, it just needs to be cleaned up a bit 🙂
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May 3, 2018 at 2:52 pm #10197
Hey @negeen-dargahi!
Haha…thanks! So, you would go with the second, more light-hearted version? I have several videos in my media section. The first one is an overview, which covers much of this, so I wouldn’t mind showing a little more personality in the LinkedIN version.
Also, I see a lot of those points in the script. Can you detail what needs to be cleaned up?
Thanks and enjoy a great day!!!
Scott
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May 3, 2018 at 4:31 pm #10215
Hi @scott-trueblood – I’d much rather have you follow this outline and then re-write your entire infomercial based on this structure for me to provide feedback on:
- Start off asking 3 POWERFUL and non-complex pain point questions
- “If this sounds like you… I know exactly how to help! Hi, I’m Scott Trueblood and I am a ______ helping clients ________”
- 3-5 sentences HOW you help your clients / why they should work with you
- call to action
That will be a lot easier for me to pinpoint what needs fixing 🙂
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May 3, 2018 at 5:23 pm #10247
I think that’s where I’m having trouble. When I start writing a ‘non-complex’ pain point, I just sound like a used car salesman. I hate selling anyway, so that’s the last thing I want to sound like. Any suggestions on simplification without sounding like I’m pouring on the Velveeta (nothing against Velveeta…it’s a great faux cheese, I’m sure…just sayin’)? I mean, the issues are detailed above in the opening paragraphs, I’m just not sure how to shorten them, ya know!
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May 4, 2018 at 4:46 pm #10372
Hey @scott-trueblood, no offense taken by the Velveeta comment, it really does need to improve it’s plastic flavor. How about you send me 3 pain point questions and I can help you tweak if necessary 🙂
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May 7, 2018 at 1:03 pm #10528
Awesome! Yeah–I guess two of them would be similar to the Pain-Point Questions I pose above, which are (worded differently below, but would still need much tweaking):
- Are you having a tough time growing your business in a competitive industry?
- Would you like to remove the headaches of dealing with your marketing efforts, without losing any control?
- Are you tired of dealing with sales people on your marketing efforts, and instead, would like to work with an objective voice with your goals and budget in mind?
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May 7, 2018 at 4:13 pm #10542
@scott-trueblood – exactly! Yes so those questions (after you fine-tune them) are great pain point questions because they are specific and deep! Well done!
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May 7, 2018 at 4:29 pm #10546
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May 8, 2018 at 9:18 am #10587
I like #1
#2 works
So, what do you mean by ‘marketing efforts’ because you mention it twice. Only mention it once if you can.
#3 needs work because it’s a bit complex and if there’s a way you can re-write your point that would be great!
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May 8, 2018 at 10:46 am #10613
Good deal–by ‘marketing efforts’ I mean all the activities involved in bringing together a company’s marketing–advertising, direct marketing, internet & mobile marketing, website, printing and promotional products and social media, etc.
How about this…
#3 Would you like to work with an objective partner instead of sales people with an agenda?
The idea is that because BrandVision works in all forms of marketing, we are not tied to offering one form. Rather, we look at the goals and develop a plan to meet those objectives. I certainly don’t want to slam sales people because we want and need good working relationships with them to help bring everyting to life. So I could say ‘subjective voices with an agenda’ and say essentially the same thing. Thoughts?
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May 9, 2018 at 12:39 pm #10798
Hi @scott-trueblood! I agree with Laura. This is much better!
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May 9, 2018 at 9:29 am #10735
@scott-trueblood I just happened to notice your conversation here and i have to say, I LOVE that last question! I definitely want an objective partner instead of someone w/ a sales agenda!
You sure are taking massive action!
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May 9, 2018 at 10:01 am #10754
Awesome!!! Thanks, Laura!
I attached a pic for your avatar on here!
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May 9, 2018 at 10:43 am #10757
oh my goodness! too funny!
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May 9, 2018 at 12:51 pm #10807
Whattaya mean! I thought you liked that picture! Isn’t that what we used for your last business cards?
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May 9, 2018 at 7:05 pm #10919
yep it is but I definitely need a new headshot!
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May 10, 2018 at 10:28 am #10952
That one’s great…you’re awesome!!! Did Al do that one for you?
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